I want to write out how I feel, what I need, what happens during the day and so forth. But I cannot bring myself to do it all the time. First off no one reads this whiney garbage and secondly I guess I have been too depressed to do anything like that.
I decided last night to tell the love how I felt and well.... I said I am sick of being sick and sick of fighting it. I dont want to fight it anymore. He asked if I would rather not be living and I couldnt answer him. Most times during the day I feel I would rather just go, I am in so much pain most of the day and when I am having a good day (which is rare), I feel like I am pushing the good day forward - like I am not really happy.
I'll try to write more... sometime.
I read the blogs and look for your posts.... I love you very much and want you to know that you are strong. Remember that you are amazing and can do anything.
ReplyDeleteI think I need to visit my Momma L :)